Last night I went to an event under the stars and the moon in Hollywood, so strange you can only know and feel and see the truth by actrully be there, live through it , it was a music award, singing dancing giving price and eating and chatting and meeting people, it remind me in the old days in China, performers sing their livers out but the rich people just there either falling a sleep or flirt with their new mistress, performers are just there like a life moving painting on the wall, or to those people's mind, maybe the painting is not moving but their imagined lust night with a stranger or the chicken leg in theirr plate, that's why my parents never wanted me and always againsted me to be an actress or finger or dancer, my parents beat me up and throw my shoe away when I was trying to be a balei dancer.......
Nothing normally would come out of a party but fun delight forgoten memories of the unimportant moments......
Sometimes I don't even remember what had happend? Or where and what did I do, where did I go or meet or talked to, pieces of moments in the lights shines for a second died, and I am so bad about people's names, just cannot remember......
Especially the over long
Last name, i had a boy friend till we broken up I still did not know how to spell and write his last name, maybe that's why we broken up?
Had an audition this morning in Paremount, very intersting process of the concept of audition, you read with director producers and casting director, they put you on camera, then watch you so closely after words, wondering how many people they tape each day, how many you actrully can or will watch once more? and what kind of jokes you are making when you watch them till one person stuck your mind, that's it, but there are different mind in the room, producer's and director's, what do you do when your mind stopped by different people at different time? Big sight for real? Anyway when I think of thinking of it already give me a heading, how random those things are, like autumn leaves, each one pass by, but stopped suddenly.......
Sent via BlackBerry by AT&T
